It’s time to start being brutally honest with yourself. And I don’t mean that in some abstract, Oh, stop lying to yourself sense of the word — I mean it literally, as in stop fooling yourself into thinking that you know everything and are right about everything, because you don’t! Whether it be your health, your career, or your relationships with other people, it’s time to sit down and ask yourself some hard questions. Here are three life-changing questions to get you started…
The first question: what do I want?
What do you want from life? When was the last time you took some time out of your day, just for yourself, and really thought about what would make you happy? We often get caught up in the hustle and bustle of everyday life that we forget to take a step back and ask ourselves what we truly want. It might seem like an impossible question at first, but it doesn’t have to be. All it takes is a little bit of introspection.
Perhaps you’re having trouble answering this question because you don’t know where to start. That’s okay! Just think back on all the things that made you happy in the past or all the things that are important to you right now. What kind of relationships do you value most? How do you envision spending the rest of your days? Do you believe in something greater than yourself (e.g., a deity, universal energy)? What makes someone attractive to you? These are only a few examples; there are no wrong answers here!
The more honest with yourself you can be, the better able you’ll be to figure out what brings meaning into your life. Once again, self-reflection may not come naturally — so take some time today and every day after that — to remind yourself of who ‘YOU’ want to become.
The second question: who do I want to become?
This question is all about your future self. It’s about what you want your life to look like one, five or even 10 years from now. If you can’t see yourself in the future then it’s difficult to get there. I always tell people that it’s important not just for them but for their family and friends too. They will have a lot more fun being around someone they know they’ll grow old with than someone they don’t know where they’ll end up in 10 years time. Asking this question will make it easier for you to answer the next one. But it won’t necessarily be an easy question to ask. There may be things that you would love to change about your past and mistakes you wish you could undo.
The key though is understanding how these events have shaped who you are today. In order to do that, it’s helpful if you’re willing to accept responsibility for what happened without judging yourself too harshly or blaming others excessively (e.g., your parents).
The third question: why do I want it?
It’s important to know why you want something in order to succeed at it. In other words, the reason behind your desire has a direct correlation with how much effort you’re going to put into achieving your goal. If you can’t answer the question why do I want this, then what are you fighting for? What is your true motive? And if it’s not strong enough, then maybe it’s not worth fighting for. There’s no sense in struggling and giving up when we could have just stopped and figured out what we really wanted.
When we stop to think about our desires, they will inevitably lead us to ask: what am I willing to give up? What am I willing to do? How long will I work? The answer is always different for everyone because we all have different goals and desires that may be stronger or weaker than others. But even still, asking yourself these questions helps you pinpoint what it is that you truly want, as opposed to things like money or fame.
We don’t need things like money and fame to live a happy life so we might as well save ourselves the time of trying to get them by asking ourselves 3 life-changing questions first.